bubba's perfect gift

I celebrated my 32nd birthday on Independence Day this past month. A few weeks later, I got a text message from Kir. She was in Philly doing a triathlon. The text said that she had just found the perfect birthday gift for me when she went to pick up her race packet. I assumed the gift was running related, so my interest was peaked. What could it be? Goofy bumper sticker? Funny running shirt? A case of discounted Body Glide? East Coast Hot Runner Guy? Sadly, she made me wait to find out what it was....she sent it in the mail.

Well, a few weeks go by and I was eagerly awaiting my human-sized UPS box with air holes (After all, we can't have Hot Runner Guy suffocating, can we?). Alas, the delivery was a large white envelope instead. Yipee!!! My "perfect gift" had arrived. I ripped the envelope open and....

.....ta da!



Bubba was very happy! It was a Bondi Band dedicated to him. Aw, thanks Kir!

Now, I have never used a Bondi Band before, so I was intrigued. I sweat buckets when I run, so I was a little skeptical that it would work. I've worn it for a few weeks now, and I have to say I'm impressed by it's absorbency. I still get sweat in my eyes, but it's not as bad as it used to be. I tend to pull it down every once in a while and use it to wipe my eyes...it's quite handy. The only down side is that I forget that I'm wearing it and often wonder why people are staring at me so much, until I realize that they are trying to read my forehead. This,and the fact that I'm advertising that I like to eat, maaaaay be one of the reasons why I'm still single.

Just a side note about Bubba....I think he thinks I may have scurvy. I have eaten an obscene amount of fruit and vegetables in the past five days. Here's the break down...
oranges: 5
plums: 5

kiwis: 5
bananas: 10
salads: 4
bags of frozen veggies: 2
apples: 2
handfuls of dried cranberries: too many to count
watermelon: 1/4
Bubba: happy
TheBets: acidic mouth screaming for mercy

almost but not quite

I just got back from my endurance run for the week. These are a few things I learned/encountered/pondered.

1. Got up, drank two BIG cups of coffee (will I ever learn?), filled up my fuel belt, stretched, and headed out the door.

2. Bernie from the Block is no where to be seen. I saw him on my Wednesday run and noticed that he got a new haircut. I think he is in hiding out of embarrassment....he looks pretty sissy (or at least more sissy than usual). If I can catch him later when I take my dogs for a walk, I will post a picture....celebrity mug shot style.

3. Mile 2....Hot Runner Guy sighting!!!! So, Kate, you can start plotting/recording. Saturday, 10:30 a.m., Vandalia/Rte.159. Our prayers need to be more specific. He was, in fact, running towards me. However, he was on the wrong side of the street. If he followed the "rules" (see hot runner guy) he would instantly lose his status as hot runner guy. He would switch to Reckless Stupid Dead Runner Guy because he would have to run into traffic to do his 180 degree turn to talk to me. I am happy to report to Katie that he was running with a Hot Runner Friend, but you were not running with me...which will not do...according to the aforementioned prayer.

4. My fuel belt bottles are pieces of crap. I have replaced some of them before for the same reason. I have one that has sprung a leak. The leak is on the side of the bottle...just a tiny hole in the seam, so if you squeeze it, a bitty stream of liquid shoots out. In my infinite wisdom, I don't check which one it is before I load them up and make my way out the door. So, either I look like I wet my pants if the offending bottle is in the back, or (as the case was today) look like I sprouted an extra sweat gland between my 2nd and 3rd ribs. Thankfully, I was far enough away from Hot Runner Guy to have him notice the interesting "sweat pattern" that I was sporting on today's run.

5. Mile 2.5-Hot Runner Guy and Hot Runner Friend do actually turn around and are now running with me....but on the other side of the street....and they run faster than Hot Runner Girl....now it looks like I'm chasing them...which I'm not...I can't help it that they turned around!!!

6. Mile 3-Mob of tweenies taking up the entire sidewalk are walking towards me. I'm trying to figure out their interesting attire. They are wearing knee-high socks....on only one leg...and they are striped. Now, when I was in junior high, we wore some interesting fashions (i.e. tight rolled jeans, hyper color t-shirts, jelly shoes) that were questionable, so I am not one to talk. Seriously though, which brain trust among them decided it would be cool to wear one striped sock pulled up over their knee cap? Those ladies are going to have some interesting tan lines come summer. Tweenies do not hold their ground like Chicken Lady and I parted the mob like the Red Sea and go on my way, shaking my head in disbelief.

7. Mile 4- Cup 2 of the coffee is talkin' back. Gotta go...NOW. Stop at Moto Mart. There is a line. I'm doing the pee-pee dance. After the ladies in front of me take their own sweet time chit-chatting with the attendant, I ask her if I can use the facilities. OUT OF ORDER!!! Now, you would think that the attendant would recognize the international sign of immediate need of a toitee, a.k.a. the pee-pee dance, and tell me that BEFORE I waited in the line, but she wasn't the most observant person alive. The Chatty Cathy's in front of me advised me to risk life and limb and run across Saturday morning 159 traffic and go to Shop n' Save. I politely thanked them for their unsolicited advice and ran to Sonic at mile 5.

8. Mile 8...finish. Decide to take Ross and Buster for a walk. Pray that Hot Runner Guy and Hot Runner Friend listen to the Spirit next Saturday and run on my side of the street.

hot runner guy

There is a guy who runs a lot in Cville. Kate discovered him....and named him. We call him Hot Runner Guy. He first appeared in the summer of 2007 (as far as I know). Kate had the idea that every time we see him, that we pray for his wife.....which is, in fact, me (at least in my head).

One time, Katie and I were driving on Beltline and saw Hot Runner Guy. I was in mid-conversation and just shouted "HOT RUNNER GUY!!!" I frantically texted Kate that there was an official Hot Runner Guy sighting. And so, the tradition begins....we broadcast Hot Runner Guy run-ins (literally) whenever they occur. His wife is prayed for often.

He is quite the dedicated runner. I have yet to "run" into him on my local running routes. You would think that we would eventually cross paths considering the sheer amount of miles we both put in around town. Sigh, alas I have yet to have an official in-person run-in with Hot Runner Guy. Of course, when I do, he will become instantly drawn to me and will do a 180 degree turn and decide to run with me. I will discover that he is a Godly man who is 30-something, funny, single, employed, and is looking for a short, chubby, cute and endearing, slightly quirky, Godly woman (that he has seen on occasion and secretly calls "Hot Runner Girl"). I, of course, will look FABULOUS and not sweaty or gross at all.

And Hot Runner Guy and Hot Runner Girl (me) lived happily ever after......