Wednesday, April 30, 2008

confession

I have a confession to make. I mock other runners. I am so, so, sorry, but I just can't resist sometimes. There are a lot of silly runners out there. Now, I am not immune to silliness of my own, so feel free to mock me if you see me out running too. In this particular instance, I am admitting to mocking runners with silly running form. My obsession with silly runners reminds me of a Monty Python skit called the Silly Olympiad that features....silly runners.



Today's blog is a critique of runners with silly arms. This obsession started when I was visiting my brother and sister-in-law in Chicagoland this summer. I went for a 16 miler on a popular trail that runs through the western suburbs...I had a lot of time to mock the silliness. Fleet Feet was apparently sponsoring some kind of training run that day, so there were A LOT of runners out that morning. Here is what I saw...and proceeded to mock.

1. The Rocky Runner....runs with arms in an upward jabbing motion. I was worried if they tripped, they would lose a tooth or two or give themselves a black eye.

2. The Cleavage Maker....runs with arms tight up to boobies, no arm movements...just squeezin' the girls.

3. The Windmiller....runs with arms in a wide circular motion...think 3 year old kid. BIG waste of energy, especially in the middle of summer in Chicago. However, amusing to watch as long as you give them a wide clearance to avoid getting caught in their windmill action.

4. The Dumb and Dumber....nuff said.


5. The Clencher....runners that clench and release their fists. Do they have finger cramps? Are they saying hi? What are they thinking about? Milking Cows?

I have more, but I'll spare you....I betcha can't resist the MOCK-ING! temptation next time you see a pack of silly runners...just don't PICK 'EM UP!!!!
(see above D and D reference for those of you who are not into quality cinematic masterpieces)

8 comments:

Unknown said...

There's a gal who runs the lake near our house that hubby and I have dubbed "high arm girl." She holds her arms clenched up in front of her chest; I can't imagine she could run very far like that! (However, she is really fast).

Nitmos said...

I've often wondered what people think of my running form. In my mind, I'm a smooth gazelle. I probably actually lokk like I'm having a seizure though.

Marcy said...

I've gotta Number 3 over here that I see often. I always need to give him A LOT of room when passing. So annoying. So annoying LOL

Razz said...

yeah, I think I'm pretty slick until I catch my running shadow or run past a building with reflective glass.

I occasionally shake out my fingers on long runs so I can get circulation in them.

Topher said...

I'm a clencher. You didn't self-expose; which kind are you?

Carly said...

LMAO. I know I have some crazy running quirks but nothing beats my girlfriend who runs like Phoebe from Friends.

thebets said...

Self disclosure (this one's for you topher)...I am a 90 degree angler, no cross over, loose fingers, which I shake out every once in a while to keep them from swelling on long runs....rather boring.

Anonymous said...

This reminds me of a Seinfeld episode....the low talker, the close talker, etc. Cracks me up.
Have your fun....isn't fun what its all about?

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I'm a teacher with a running problem, or maybe I'm a runner with a teaching problem...you pick.

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races completed

A bunch of 5Ks...I've lost track over the years...

O'Fallon (IL) YMCA 15K Winter 2007

St. Louis Track Club Half Marathon (spring) 2007

Spirit of St. Louis Marathon 2007

Boilermaker 15K Roadrace 2007 (Utica, NY)

Lewis and Clark Marathon 2007 (St. Charles, MO)

St. Louis Track Club Frost Bite Series 2008

-12K

-10 Miles

-20K

-Half Marathon

Go! St. Louis Half Marathon 2008

Route 66 Festival 10K 2008 (Edwardsville, IL)

O'Fallon (IL) Summer Sizzler 15K 2008

Lewis and Clark Half Marathon 2008 (St, Charles, MO: DNS-cancelled due to Hurricane Ike)

O'Fallon Fall Finale 15K 2008


St. Louis Track Club Half Marathon 2008 (PR!)

Mountain Home Half Marathon (Arkansas) 2008 (2nd in age group!)

Great River Road Run (IL) 10 miles


St. Louis Track Club Frost Bite Series 2008-2009

-12K

-10 miles

Phoenix Rock-n-Roll Marathon (AZ)

Go! St. Louis Half Marathon 2009

Kentucky Derby Half Marathon 2009


















future races

race wish list

Big Sur Marathon
Disney Marathon
Nike Marathon
Marine Corps Marathon
Great River Relay
Bolder Boulder
Chicago Distance Classic